RETURN TRIP

 


If it’s true what they say: “You should never go back “, he was breaking the rule yet again. He didn’t go back all that often. Enough, but not enough to keep his mom happy. She still hoped that one day he’d ask to be transferred and come ‘home’.
“Trouble is,” he said to himself as he watched the LA landscape shrink into the distance below him, “I’m not too sure where home is.” He was fourteen when he left. Since then he’d lived in LA, with the exception of a couple of years in army camps, and ‘Nam. Now he was pushing thirty five. More than half his life away from ‘home’.
Pushing thirty five! He could hear his mother’s voice in his head. “Your sister’s getting married. You’re not so young now Davey, you should be thinking of settling too.” No doubt she had a couple of “nice girls” lined up for him to meet at the wedding party.
He steeled himself for the unspoken battle ahead.

As the ‘plane continued its journey back in time, from west to east and from now to then, he decided that the best way to handle the trip was to sleep it out. Pulling his sweater-jacket around him, he turned into the seat and closed his eyes.
“Would you like a pillow, sir?” The stewardess was holding the pillow out to him and he reached for it gratefully. “Funny,” he thought to himself, “she looks familiar.” Then he remembered a one night stand a couple of years back – and hoped she didn’t.

The seat-belt announcement woke him. Sitting up, he tried to focus his bleary gaze out of the window. The landing strip seemed to be rushing up to meet him, he looked away.
Once off the ‘plane he hitched his old army kitbag onto his shoulder and, mentally bracing himself for the oncoming attack, went on into the arrival hall. He hardly had time to scan the waiting crowd when he heard her.
“Davey! Davey darling! Come here, let me see you. You look well. You eating properly? Not too tired after the trip? Oh Davey it’s so good to have you home!” Tears were streaming down her face, but she had a big smile too.
He grinned across his mother’s shoulder at his sister who was waiting patiently for their mother to stop her routine.
“Hey soon-to-be-married lady, when do I get to meet the future ball and chain?”
“Davey!” it was his mother, “How can you say such things!”
“Oh mom, if you don’t know now when I’m kidding I guess you never will.”
His sister intervened. “It is good to see you. Thank you, I wasn’t too sure about being ‘given away’ by Nicky, you never know what he might have traded me for!”
They both laughed, and their mother watched affectionately as brother and sister held together in a big hug. Starsky kissed his sister on the forehead, then turned and kissed his mother full on the cheek.
“OK, now I’m here, how about we go home, I’m starving.”
“I knew you didn’t eat properly……….”
Starsky winked at his sister, and laughing they followed their mother out to the parking lot.
“You want to drive, Davey?”
“No mom, you drive, it’s kinda a nice to be passenger for a change. Besides, I’m so used to the traffic getting out of the way for me I may do something crazy and get myself arrested.”

Home. The smell of his mother’s cooking filled the air as he walked into the apartment. No matter how much he and his sister yes and even Nicky, tried to talk her into finding a house in the suburbs, his mother refused to leave the neighborhood where she had grown up, married, raised her children and lost her husband. Her only concession had been to move to a newer, bigger apartment in a building with heat and modern utilities. She still shopped in the same street market and went to the same deli; she even continued to use the kosher butcher although she’d never kept the rules it was just that she knew that the quality of the meat could be relied on.
Starsky sniffed the air appreciatively, like a cat following a precious scent. He could smell his mother’s beef stew, made in the ‘old way’ from a recipe her grandmother had taught her mother. He smiled at his mother and patted his stomach “I’ll leave here fatter than I arrived.”
“You could eat more, you’re thin. Look at him, Eva; you’re brother’s as thin as a rail.”
Starsky grinned and pulled up his T-shirt revealing his torso, ‘slab of chocolate’ muscles rippled as he did so. “I’m not thin, mom, see. I’m just in great shape.”
His sister cast an appreciative look; “I can think of a lot of my girl-friends who would be very impressed by a man built like you, Davey. Maybe I should introduce you to one or two of them.”
Before their mother could say anything, Starsky winked at his sister and headed for his bedroom. “Yea, well not before I’ve showered off the journey, huh? “

The family was together for one of the rare occasions that made his mother so happy. Seated around the table were Starsky, his brother Nicky, his mom his sister and his future brother-in-law. Harry came from a family that had always lived in this neighborhood. His family came from Poland – Starsky’s mom would have preferred a ‘nice Lithuanian boy’, but at least they had ‘roots’ in the right part of Europe.
Nicky was wolfing down his dinner as if he had no time to waste.
“Nicky, eat slower, it’s bad for you to …………”
“Mom, I’m in a hurry Ok? I got people to see tonight”
“He has people to see. His brother comes home from the other side of the country” her voice rose to a wail. “His sister is eating dinner for maybe the last time in this house………”
Starsky cut in, “Come on mom. She’ll be round plenty.” Turning to his sister he added “you’re only going to live two blocks away, am I right?”
“Yea, Dave. Mom we’ll come every third Friday.”
“Every third?” Her voice rose into a sob.
“Yes; one Friday at home – you’ll come round to us - one at Harry’s parents – we’ll all go - and one here.”
“See mom, it won’t be like she’s that far away. Not like me.”
“You. One day perhaps you’ll see reason and get a transfer.”
“And one day, mom, you’ll understand that I prefer being warm all year round!”
They all laughed.
Nicky left before the others had finished eating. Starsky watched him go and wondered what his kid brother was into now. Somehow he felt sure it was best he didn’t know.
Dinner over, his mother asked him if he was going out that that evening.
“Where to? Anyway I’m tired, I have jet lag and I need my beauty sleep.”

Where would he go anyway? The kids he had grown up with were strangers now. He hadn’t seen most of them since he was fourteen. There were too many places he’d have to watch his back and he couldn’t even be sure that some childhood friend might not be on the wrong side now. He had seen the men in the alley, and their sons knew that he had. Even if he had never told what he’d seen, some people would prefer to silence him.
As long as he was home, he was better off keeping out of the sight of some people.

*****************************************


His mother woke him the next morning, clattering around in the kitchen. He crawled out of bed and made for the shower. Showered and shaved, dressed in fresh jeans and a loose blue shirt, he went into the kitchen.
His mother was making eggs. “How many do you want Davey?”
“Two mom, that’s fine.”
“Toast?”
“I’ll get it.” He went over to the toaster and slipped in two fresh-cut slices. Then after pouring himself a mug of coffee, he went back to the table and sat down, just as his mother slipped a plate of scrambled eggs in front of him.
“Look at your hair!”
“What about it?”
“Looks like you didn’t have it cut for a year.”
“Let’s not exaggerate mom, say nine months!”
“Oh Davey, you can’t give your sister away looking like some kind of hippie.”
“Hippie ! Mom people wear their hair long now; I have to fit in with the crowd sometimes, if you know what I mean.”
“Maybe you do and maybe you don’t, but either we find you some of your sister’s bobby pins or you have your hair cut.”
“Huh?” Starsky had to take this in slowly.
“You have to wear a kippa, Davey. The wedding is formal.”
“Orthodox”
“Harry’s family keeps kosher, the boy doesn’t but his mom and dad do. The wedding is at the Temple on sixth.” Starsky whistled, “Oh boy,” he thought, the full works!”
“You’re not going to lead your sister to the canopy looking like this; when you’ve finished your breakfast we’ll go see Sammie.”
“Yes mom.” He said it with a slight smile, momma’s little Davey doing as he’s told!


In Sammie’s barber shop the old men spoke with thick accents that made Starsky think of a big jar of pickles and pastrami on rye. They spoke of the ‘old country’ and remembered times that were not so good. The younger men – not many in this time of long hair – spoke with the accents of the New York neighborhoods, tough guys and ‘wise guys’ the kind of people Starsky had to deal with most days back home.

His mother greeted Sammie and the others “Look who’s home. My little Davey !” (her son towered over her and was grinning). “He needs his hair cut Sammie, the wedding’s tomorrow and look at him.”
“That’s what happens to ‘em if they go out west, Lily. They get a little wild, they grow their hair and who knows what else!” He shot Starsky a look that said ‘let me handle you mother.’
“Sit down and I’ll be with you in a moment.”
Starsky sat in the barber’s chair and looked at the faces around him. He recognized Jimmy Lieborwitz and breathed an inner sigh of relief. Jimmy nodded to him in the mirror. Starsky nodded back. No need to say anything, they both knew why Jimmy was there.

Sammie started snipping. Starsky’s wild curls began to scatter on the floor by the chair.
“Hey” he said, “be careful, I got ears in there somewhere! That’s enough ok.”
His mother, however was not satisfied. “Sammie, trim a little more around his ears, and the back of his neck.”
Before Starsky could protest Sammie finished the job.
“Shit! “ he thought, “looks like when I got home from Hawaii !”
His mother pulled out her purse “Hey come on mom, I can pay for my own hair cut you know.” Sammie pushed them both away, “This one’s on me. Call it a coming home gift!”

“Now, young man, we’d better go buy you a suit.”
“Mom, I think I’d rather do that alone.”
“Your mother is coming with you, God knows what you might buy if I’m not there!”
Starsky decided that it was better to give in.

Three stores later, his mother was finally satisfied that Starsky had the correct clothing to give his sister away. He was equipped with a black suit– he won and the trousers had a slight flare which covered his shoes. They had also bought a white shirt, black bow-tie, patent leather loafers.
“You look like you should be in a magazine.” His mother told him.
Starsky made no comment.

As they made their way back to the apartment, Starsky had the feeling that they had company. Glancing in a store-front window he saw a man about fifteen yards back, slow his pace. Maybe I’ve been a cop too long; the guy might just be on his way home too. He kept the thought to himself. Two blocks later he used a second window as a mirror. The guy was still there and he was still about fifteen yards behind. Starsky ducked down; “Shoe lace, mom.” He could still see the reflection in the window. The other guy had stopped. He couldn’t see the guy’s face, and somewhere deep in his mind that worried him. He hurried his mom for the last block home.

*********************************************************************

The next day the apartment was in uproar. His sister was trying to arrange her hair and fasten her dress at the same time. His mother was fussing like a hen around her brood; telling Nicky to shine his shoes, retying Starsky’s tie three times. The only person to keep calm was Starsky himself. He’d tried calming his mother and given up long ago.
The doorbell rang.
“There’s the car and we’re not ready” wailed his mother.
“OK, mom, we have plenty of time, and anyway the bride is supposed to be late.”
Nicky had disappeared. Starsky shouted for him and he came in from the fire-escape where he’d been smoking a sneaked cigarette. Before his mother could comment his older brother said “You still smoke? “
“It’s ok brother cop, this one was bought in store.”
Starsky grimaced. He didn’t want to know what Nicky might smoke when he was not home.

They went down to the car.

Starsky did his brotherly duty and gave his sister to her new husband. He hadn’t been inside of a synagogue since his Bar Mitzvah and he felt strangely out of place but secure. He never really thought about it. He was Jewish the way Hutch was blond. That’s the way the cookie crumbled.
His mother cried. His sister and new brother-in-law smiled. The newly weds led their families and friends to the nearby hotel where the reception was to be held.
As he went into the lobby Starsky’s instincts made him turn round. Coming through the door was the man he’s seen the day before. Seeing Starsky, the guy ducked into the men’s room. Before Starsky could follow him, a hand on his arm held him back. Sid ‘The Kid’ Guthrie stood grinning up at him... “Dave, good to see you, you remember me?" No taller that four foot ten in his socks Sid had been given his nickname when he stopped growing about twenty years ago and it made him kind of hard to forget. What Starsky remembered about him most was two things. One, the guy might have been tiny, but he could out-fight guys twice his size. Two, he was Joe Durniak’s favorite nephew.
“How could I forget you Sid?”
“Did you see Jerry going into the John just now?”
“Jerry?”
“Yea, you remember Jerry. Best…” Sid smiled as he changed his mind…”no second best footballer we had back then.” Starsky was flattered, the kid had worshiped him when he played ball.
“I wasn’t that good, and Jerry was.”
“Maybe so; but you know for me you were the best.”
“So what’s Jerry doing here, or is he one of the broken-hearted guys my sister left behind?”
“Jerry works for Uncle Joe, Dave. He’s, shall we say, one of your guardian angels.”
“And I need a guardian angel, right?”

Before they could say any more, Eva came over and grabbed Starsky by the wrist.
“If you don’t come and sit down so’s we can get started momma’s going to have a fit. She’s so wrought up Dave, just humor her will you?”
“I’m coming sweetie. Hey I’ve even prepared a speech.”
“Oh-oh “
“Don’t worry, I won’t tell about the time you nearly lost your panties in the grocery store or anything like that.” Seeing her face he smiled, his natural kindness getting the better of his delight in winding up his little sister. “Don’t panic, it’s a real nice speech, I promise I won’t even wind mom up.”

They went into the hall. Tables lined the two sides of the room and a third, raised above the others, formed the top of a squared-off horseshoe. At the top table two chairs were waiting for the bride and her brother. Eva climbed the two steps, lifting the front of her dress to avoid falling. Her brother hopped both steps in one and was there to take her hand and guide her to her seat.
“Ladies and Gentlemen, the Happy Couple.”
One hundred and fifty people raised their glasses and drank to the bride and groom.
While they were eating, Starsky dutifully spoke to his sister’s new mother-in-law. Harry’s mother struck Dave as a little ‘uptight’, she had already glanced nervously at Joe Durniak, seated a couple of seats further on – guest of honor of the bride’s family.
“That man” she asked Starsky, “I have heard that he is involved with…with the Mafia; your mother tells me he’s a friend of the family?”
“Joe? Yes, I guess you could say he runs a family business (family with a capital F, ma’am) but he’s also a very nice guy. He was one of my father’s closest friends.”
Mrs. Krantz looked at Starsky “Your father’s closest friend, but I thought that your father was…”
“He was a cop ma’am. He and Joe went to school together. As long as Joe didn’t go too far, my father didn’t get involved. Joe’s done a lot of things that I don’t like ma’am, but I know one thing, he loved my father…and he looked after my family after dad was killed.”

…tell your mother the funeral’s paid for…they weren’t mine…
Starsky saw himself in the alley fifteen years back. ‘Bang’
He realized that Mrs. Krantz was speaking to him again, her voice jolted him back.
“He helped…”
“Yes ma’am, he paid for the funeral and he made sure that my mom was ok after I went out west. Now I think about it I guess he must have paid for that too. You see, ma’am I saw them, I knew them and Uncle Joe wanted me out of their way.”

Mrs. Krantz seemed too stunned to say any more. Starsky decided it was a good moment to change the subject. The dessert had been served and he rose to his feet.

“Ladies and Gentleman, it is usually the bride’s father who makes the first speech, but I’m afraid you’ll have to make do with her big brother. I’ve known Eva since she was a baby – no kidding; I remember when she was born. My mom got fat, she went to the hospital, she came back thin and she had this snotty squalling baby with her. Well when you’re five years old you don’t always appreciate these things, especially at four in the morning.” Starsky let the laughter die down before he went on.
“Anyway Eva grew up, and so did I, and by the time it happened again and momma brought home Nicky we’d both worked it out for ourselves. Now I see that my kid sister has been putting into practice” (he glanced at his sister, faked a look of surprise, and continued) "Oh I’m sorry ladies and gentleman; they haven’t been practicing as much as I thought!
Anyway, I have to admit that although Eva is my kid sister, I don’t really know her as well as some of you do. I went away when she was still little and I don’t come back too often – don’t want momma getting me hitched! Sorry mom, only kidding.
Anyhow, like I was saying, I may not know her as well as some of you, but I do know one thing: Harry is one lucky man. Not only does he get my beautiful sister, he gets my momma’s recipes and my blessing.
So now I ask you to raise your glasses and once again drink to the health and happiness of my kid sister and her husband; Eva and Harry.”
Starsky raised his glass and led the toast. When he sat down again, Mrs. Krantz leaned towards him and whispered “That was a very nice speech but you shouldn’t tease your mother like that. You love her very much don’t you?”
Starsky was surprised by that remark and looked at her.
“You blushed when you spoke about your mother.”

Harry’s best friend then made the usual speech designed to embarrass the groom as much as possible. When he had finished the band started to play a waltz. Starsky stood up and took his sister by the hand to guide her to the floor. As they went down the steps he whispered in her ear “I promise to try not to tread on your toes”. It had the effect he wanted, Eva was tense and as he spoke she smiled and relaxed.
He led her into the middle of the floor, put one arm around her waist and the other round her shoulders and carefully waltzed her around the room. After a couple of minutes he said “Ok that’s enough duty, now dance with the guy you came in with!” As he released her he beckoned his brother-in-law onto the floor and with an exaggerated bow left the newly-weds to dance together.

Starsky danced with a few women, a couple of his mother’s friends, and a couple of Eva’s friends. Soon his feet were beginning to ache from being constricted in unfamiliar formal shoes and his body started reminding him that only forty eight hours earlier he’d been in another time zone. He decided to sit it out.
He allowed his mother to do what he called her ‘Yenta routine’ and tell one of her friends what a catch he would be for a ‘nice girl’. Somewhere along the line he lost his tie. Sometime along the line he had one drink too many. He never drank much and a couple of glasses of champagne could take their effect fast.
He wondered for a split second what Hutch was doing and grinned to himself as he thought “one thing’s for sure, he won’t be drinking champagne.”


“Something making you smile Davey?” Joe Durniak had taken the chair next to him.
“I was just thinking that my partner is not likely to be drinking champagne right now.”

“Davey, we need to talk. Not here, everyone is having a good time. Come see me tomorrow. Sid will come and get you, around ten…” looking at Starsky Joe changed his mind, “…about twelve, ok? We’ll go to the deli and have lunch together”
“OK Joe.”
“Oh and Davey, stay here until everyone else is gone, I’ll make sure you and your mom have an escort.”
“I can take care of mom, and of myself.”
“Trust me Davey. Wait until Jerry comes to get you. Don’t ask questions, don’t try to be smart, just do as I say. For me, for your momma, and Davey, most of all for you.”
Joe put just a little too much emphasis on the last four words. Starsky decided to do as he was told. He didn’t like the sound of it.

***********************************************

It was gone eleven when Starsky finally felt capable of getting out of bed. The combination of jet-lag and champagne left him with cotton mouth and a headache that made his eyeballs feel like hot rocks. He groped his way to the bathroom and let the shower finish the waking process. He decided against shaving – knowing that his mother was sure to nag him, but “what the hell”. Pulling on his jeans and a T-shirt he wandered barefoot into the kitchen. His mother had left coffee for him and a note propped on the table: ‘I didn’t want to wake you. The coffee is fresh and there are sweet rolls in the cupboard. See you later, sweetheart.’ Coffee, not sweet rolls, was what he needed. He drank the first cup carefully, and then gulped down a second. It was eleven-thirty and Joe was expecting him at twelve. He started to the door just as the ‘phone rang.
“Yea?”
“Be careful what you say David. You wouldn’t want your momma to have an accident, now would you?”
“Who is this?”
“You don’t need to know who I am. Just remember, witnesses should be careful who they talk to.”
Before he could say anything more, the line went dead. He was still staring at the ‘phone when it rang again. This time it was Jerry. “I’ll be outside in two minutes. Don’t open the door until you see my car.”

Starsky went down the stairs and positioned himself in the hallway where he could see out, without being seen. Jerry’s car pulled up in front of the brownstone steps, and Starsky ran out and climbed into the car.
“Jerry, clue me up on all this?”
Jerry looked at him. “There are still people out there who think ya could cause them trouble Davey. Joe just wants to be sure they can’t get at ya. He’ll explain to ya, ok?”
They continued in silence, through the streets and through Starsky’s past.

Jerry pulled up in front of a small office building. One of those non-descript addresses that hide anything from ambulance-chasers to small family businesses. The two men got out of the car and went in. The door said: ‘Durniak Enterprises Inc.’ That covered a multitude of possibilities.

“Davey come in. You sleep ok? Not feeling too bad this morning?”
“No, I’m fine. Joe I want to know what the hell is going on. I gotta ‘phone call this morning and………..”
“And some guy told you in a round about way to keep your mouth shut.”
“Something like that.”
“What did he tell you?”
“The guy said that witnesses should be careful who they talk to; he threatened mom.”
“Jerry!” Joe shouted, “Come in here. Ok Jerry now listen to me. You’re going to pay a courtesy call on young Ricky – you know who I mean. You tell him that Lily Starsky is a very good friend of mine and that I hold him personally responsible for her health and safety. You got that Jerry? ‘Personally responsible’”

Starsky’s eyebrows registered that he got it too. Ricky, that could only be Ricky Melrose.
“Ricky’s taken over his dad’s territory, has he?”
“Yes, and Davey, he’s twice as bad as the old man. He ran down every last bit if opposition that his dad had when he took over, and there weren’t many left to tell the tale. He wouldn’t dare come after me, and he still shows respect – if you see what I mean.”
Starsky saw only too well what Joe meant by respect. Men had lost the tips of their fingers for not showing respect. Some had lost a lot more than that.
“But where does Ricky come into this. His old man wasn’t there.”
“He gave the order, Davey. I only found out a long time after. Too late to do much about it. It’s a long story. Come on kid, we’ll go have a nice old-fashioned deli lunch – or are you too much into the junk they eat in California.”
“No, you know what, there are delis out there, but nothing like the ones back east. I dunno, must be the sunshine makes them forget their roots or something.”
Joe laughed. “Come on Davey, let’s go eat.”

They sat in a table between the door and the counter. Joe had walked straight over to in a way that signaled that it was his regular table, and that maybe nobody else ever had the right to sit there.
Joe ordered pastrami on rye with mustard and pickle in the side; “the kid will have the same. Hey Louey, you remember little Davey don’t you. Bring him his favorite Sunday treat as well.”
When the order arrived Starsky grinned wide. Pastrami on rye with mustard, a big green pickle and a latke. The latke was steaming hot with a crisp outside and the potato and onion just melted together perfectly. He took an appreciative bite and burned his tongue.
“That will teach you patience Davey, you haven’t changed, even as a little kid you wouldn’t give the things time to cool. Hey Louey, the boy needs some ice-water to cool his tongue.”

While they ate, Joe started to fill Starsky in on what had been happening since he’d been home the last time. Men had been arrested, guys had been killed and plenty died of natural causes. “We’re getting old, my generation, and I worry about what will happen when we’re gone. You know what I mean?”
Starsky nodded, whether on the east coast or on the west coast (or any place else for that matter) the old generation was going and the younger hoods had a different attitude. “We kept it local, you know. There was respect, but now, they shoot each other for a nickel and dime operation. The sell junk to school kids and put them on the street to pay for it.”
“I know Uncle Joe, I see it every day, remember.”
“Yes, well here things are turning bad, and your family can easily get caught in the middle.”
“Hey you make that sound like what I saw when I was a kid isn’t all the story.”
“It isn’t. Your brother keeps bad company, Davey. Worse, he doesn’t know how bad it is. They want to use him to get to you, and Nicky isn’t as smart as you are, he doesn’t see it, he just thinks that the big players are interested in his little dodges.”

Starsky’s face hardened. “What is Nicky into that I should know about, Joe?”
“He deals a little weed. He runs numbers for Billy-boy. What he’s doing isn’t the problem Davey, it’s who he’s doing it with.”

“Billy-boy, he’s still alive? He must be about a hundred years old by now; he was old when I was little!”
“Eighty five if he’s a day, and he’s as sharp as ever. Got his finger on the pulse. It was Billy told me about your brother’s bad company.”

“So just who is Nicky running with?”

“Sid Brenner, Hughie Docherty, Sal Mariano…you want me to go on?”
It was the last name that sent a shiver down Starsky’s spine. Mariano’s father was the biggest, meanest hoodlum in the neighborhood ever since he could remember. He’d seen a couple of files back in LA about possible associates of the Mariano ‘team’ who had met with nasty accidents in places like Cal-Neva and Vegas. He knew that Sal had taken over his father’s patch, and the thought of Nicky being anywhere near the guy made Starsky feel sick.
He sighed and attacked what was left of his lunch.
“So,” said Joe, “you ready for dessert?”
“Depends on what it is.”
“Come on, I’ll show you.”

They left the deli (Starsky didn’t notice Joe pay for lunch) and went a couple of stores further along the street. Starsky couldn’t hold back a little whoop of delight; Lena’s store was still there. The storefront hadn’t changed. Generations of kids had stood and drooled in front of the finest display of cheesecakes you could imagine.
Joe led him to the counter. Lena hadn’t changed much, well she’d maybe gained another twenty pounds and there was more gray than auburn in her hair, but she was still the same old Lena who had brought joy to the hearts (and stomachs) of so many.
She turned and looked at Starsky. She missed a couple of beats and the exclaimed
“Well look who’s come back! Davey you are so like your father…” Starsky knew that Lena had hoped that she, not her best friend Lily, would become Mrs. Starsky. For a fleeting moment (and not for the first time) he speculated about how life might have turned out if his dad had married the cheesecake queen. “I’d be the size of a house, that’s for sure,” he said to himself. As the thought went through his head, he couldn’t help smiling, and Lena took that for a greeting.
“So you came home for your sister’s wedding.”
“No Lena, I came for you chocolate marble cheesecake with the cherry topping.”
“Baby, that’s what you’re going to have.”
“Make it take-away, Lena, Davey here and I need to have a long conversation.”
Lena boxed a double portion of cheesecake and handed it to Starsky with a wink.
Joe led the way out of the store and into the black limo that had appeared from nowhere.

Once in the car, Joe turned to Starsky and put his hand on the younger man’s arm.
“Davey I don’t like what’s happening. I’m getting old and I’m losing control of the people here, I never told you, but I have a business on the West Coast – no kid, not in your beat – and I’m seriously thinking of going to live out there. Thing is, I worry about your momma and who will keep an eye on young Nicky. The boy doesn’t have your intelligence, he sees the glitz and he wants it, but he doesn’t have the wits to keep him out of trouble. Like I said, there are people out there who are going to try to use Nicky to get to you. They may not even do it while you’re here; they have contacts out west too.
But that’s not why I want to talk to you today. “

“What do you want to talk about, Joe?”

“Your friend back west is biting off more than he may be able to chew. He must be Ok or you wouldn’t have kept him as a partner, but is he streetwise, Davey?”

“Hutch, streetwise!” Starsky nearly started laughing, then he pulled up straight. “No Joe, Hutch is not streetwise! More like corn-field-wise! No he’s a very bright guy, you know, educated even – ‘cept he dropped out of college to fight the good anti-war fight! If he hadn’t I don’t think I’d have him as a partner, more likely an adversary defense lawyer taking on all the scum I try to get off the streets. He’s a good guy, Joe but he still has a lot to learn about the world he’s chosen to work in. So he’s in trouble the moment my back’s turned huh?”

Joes looked at him in a way that Starsky knew meant that he had just whammed the nail with a two-hand sledge-hammer.

“They’ve sent a hit-man out there. The idea is to trap you into going back too soon. If you hear from Hutch, advise him, warn him, but stay here until I tell you otherwise.”

Starsky did not like the sound of that. He tried to work out how in the hell he could help Hutch out of trouble from the other side of the country.
Joe continued. “Callendar, the name mean anything to you?”
“Callendar?...Callendar, yeah wasn’t he the guy who iced Jimmy the Fiddle a few years back? I thought he disappeared – you know as in ‘meet the fishes kiddo’.” Seeing Joe’s face, he added “No, I guess he didn’t take a one-way deep-sea dive. He’s out there now?”
“Yes. They’ve woven a story to trap Hutch and from what I hear they’re succeeding.
Don’t worry, though, I have someone out there keeping an eye on things. He should report to me tonight. Now go home, eat your cheesecake and spend some time with your momma.”


********************************************************

Starsky was restless. He couldn’t stay in the apartment all day. He decided “what the hell” and went out.

Walking along the streets of his childhood felt strange. The same stores were still there but many of the people were gone, replaced by their kids or even their grandchildren. Starsky thought he recognized a few of the younger faces, but he couldn’t be sure. He wondered if they would remember him. He’d left this place twenty years ago, and although everyone in the family said how much he looked like his father – and he knew that this was true – he wondered how much toll time and life had taken on him. He’d gone away a shy kid of fourteen, fighting a seemingly never-ending battle against spots and newly-discovered lust. Looking through a store front window he saw a young woman standing behind the counter, she saw him. Their eyes met and Dave found himself wondering whether he dared go into the store. Sharon beckoned him in before he could walk away.

“Well you haven’t changed!” They said it almost in unison, but each knew how much this was an automatic greeting. Sharon had put on a few pounds since they’d last seen each other. She hadn’t been at the wedding, so Dave guessed that she didn’t count herself amongst Eva’s friends. No reason to either, the few years between them could make a difference. He instinctively glanced at her left hand. A thin gold band on the third finger assured him he was on safe ground. He noticed her eyes; she was looking up from his left hand.

“I’m amazed nobody caught you yet!” She said with a shy smile. “I married Bobby Levy, remember him? How could Dave forget him, Bobby Levy, the kid every boy in the class wanted to be. He was taller and cooler than all of them, his dad had a couple of shoe stores, and in the neighborhood Starsky grew up in that made him something to be rated with the millionaires on Park Avenue. So here was Sharon, running one of the Levy shoe stores.
“You went away such a long time ago, and you left so quickly. I never really understood why your mom didn’t want to keep you near her after your dad was…after he…”
“After he was murdered. You can say it you know. I learned to live with it. And anyway I’ve seen worse since then.”
“Worse?”
“Well maybe not so terrible on a personal level, but I’ve seen the messes that people make of other people’s lives and deaths.”
“Why did you leave so fast?”
He couldn’t resist a little of the flippancy that drove Hutch nuts – and that he used to hide how he really felt. “Well first off, you wouldn’t answer my notes in English class, and Sharman had left school by then so I guess there was no real reason to stay, “ he smiled his wolfish lopsided smile, “if you see what I mean.”

“Oh Dave, you always were a kidder.”
“Yes. But you know I went away because it wasn’t safe for me to stay.”
“What happened to you?”
‘Oh, I went to LA, turned down a glamorous job in the movies, went to Viet Nam, became a cop. You know, run of the mill sort of stuff really”
“The movies?” her eyes were wide.
“Oh that bit I made up, but the rest is true.”

Before the conversation could go any further, a man about Dave’s age, but with twice as much flesh and half as much hair, came out of the backroom carrying a toddler. “Ricky’s thrown up again, honey, you deal with it willya?” Turning to Starsky he said “Can I help you…wait a minute…Dave? Dave Starsky? I don’t believe it, still chasing after Sharon huh? Well she’s a happily married lady now, so this time you lose!”
The two of them laughed. “I tell you what though, I’m glad I know she’s happy because I think if she had to choose now I wouldn’t stand a chance.” He patted his gut and ran a hand through what was left of his hair.

Starsky decided that he didn’t want to go any further back in time here. “I have a couple of things to get for my mom. Hey it was great seeing you!”
“Come back in another twenty years and see if I have any hair left!”

Back on the sidewalk Starsky wandered on. Passing a bar, he decided to go in and have a beer, and think some more about what Joe had told him. The bartender served him, Dave didn’t know this guy, but he had the distinct feeling that it was not mutual.
He took his glass over to a table and settled to watch a pool game.

“Hey, big brother, you want a game?”

Nicky had come out of a side room, and somehow Starsky felt that it might be better if he didn’t know what went on in there.
“Ok kid. Now because I’m feeling kind, I’ll give you the first three shots”
“Not a good idea Davey, I’ve improved since I last played with you.”
“You think I haven’t?”

Dave and Nicky, like two versions of the same person. Dave was taller and stronger built than his brother, but both had the same dark curly hair. Starsky noticed that Nicky hadn’t been dragged to the barber shop; his brother noticed the look “yea, but I wasn’t giving the bride away, was I?”
“Shut up and rack the balls”

Nicky played the first three shots, then the next three until he blew an easy ball into a side pocket. Deliberately, Starsky chalked the end of his cue. He walked around the table a couple of times, knowing how much it was pissing his little brother that he didn’t just play his shot. The first ball went straight to its home and Starsky polished off the rest of the game, smiling to himself as he did it. When the last ball had disappeared into a top pocket, Starsky turned to his kid brother, “Ok now let’s play for real stakes. $10 ok with you?”
“Play it Nicky”
Starsky looked up. Standing in the side room door was Johnny McGuire; better know as Smiling Johnny; right now he was living up to the nickname. Starsky knew that the smile started and ended just behind the lips.
“Go on Nicky. Accept you brother’s bet. I’m sure you can win.”
“Suddenly, I think I need a little air. Another time Nicky, ok? Don’t make momma mad, try to show around dinner time just this once.”
As Starsky turned to leave, Johnny blocked his path.
“Is there something?” Johnny didn’t know Starsky well enough to recognize the undertone of menace that accompanied Dave’s deadpan.
“How about a little talk, for old times’ sake, Davey?” McGuire’s blarney burr was slightly exaggerated.
“What do we have to talk about?”
“I think you know”
“Do you? Well suppose we sit down over there” – Starsky pointed to the table where his beer glass stood half full – “and have a drink, and you can tell me what’s on your mind”

“I was t’inking more of in me office” if McGuire played it much thicker he’d sound like a leprechaun.
“No, that table over there is good enough for me.” Dave had no desire to go where there might be no friendly witnesses.
“Ok then. What’ll you have?”
“Beer’s fine, I’ll finish the one I have.”
“Willya be so kind as to bring me a whiskey, Fred, Irish of course.”

Sitting with Johnny in full view of at least ten people, Starsky reckoned he was safe enough.
“So, Johnny, what’s so important?”
“Why are you back?”
“My sister got married. Someone had to give her away and as eldest brother I did my duty.”
“That all?”
“Yea. Why? Should there be another reason, Johnny?”
“I know what you do for a living Dave.”
“Yea, my momma’s so proud of ‘my son the police officer’ I guess every one in the neighborhood knows.” Again Starsky pulled off a perfect imitation of his mother’s Yiddish intonation. Nick chuckled to hear it.
“I bet she told everyone that I got promoted to detective, too.”
“That I knew, but not from you mother.”
A chill went down Starsky’s spine. They have contacts out west too.
“So what do you want from me?”
“Well it’s very simple. I want you to promise me that if any of your colleagues here should ask, you don’t remember clearly what happened; it was a long time ago, now wasn’t it?”
“Is someone likely to ask me?”
“Could be. You see a couple of weeks ago two, shall we say, older men, found themselves on the wrong side of a counter in a hold up, if you see what I mean, and since they’ve been in the slammer the cops have gotten very interested in anything else those two might have done in their long careers. For some reason the cops are particularly interested in what happened in an alley a couple of blocks from here. Their problem is that they don’t have any witnesses, and they have no reason to think that any witness might be around here. Do you see what I’m saying to you Dave?”

During the conversation, Nicky had slipped out of the bar; his brother noticed him go and wondered why he didn’t want to stick around.
In a slow, even voice, devoid of expression but with the weight of meaning loaded on every word, Starsky said “Understand Johnny. I’m a cop. Now I’m not going to go to them, but if they come to me, I do what’s right, what’s right for me, as a cop, as a witness, and as a guy who would like to see the bums who killed his father pay the price. And Johnny, if anything was to happen to my family, while I’m here or after I’m gone, I’ll know where to tell the cops to look. Do I make myself clear?”

“It’s all up to you David. If you’re sensible, no harm will come to anyone.”

“What about Callendar?” Johnny sat up with a jolt, then he slouched back with a big blarney smile on his face. “Never heard of him.”
“I’ll bet you haven’t!”
Starsky shoved back his chair and stalked out of the bar. At the door he turned and fixed Johnny with another deadpan stare. “If I find out that you do know Callendar, and that you do know what his assignment is…if I find out Johnny, you won’t be able to hide even if you go to Ireland and crawl under a rock on the Giant’s Causeway”


Nicky was waiting outside. There were two cigarette butts on the sidewalk and he was lighting another one when Starsky appeared.
“You shouldn’t do that. Bad for your health.”
“Not as bad as what you just did could be for yours. You shouldn’t make Johnny angry Davey. He’s dangerous.”
“That’s why you like to be in with him, a little thrill? Nicky, if you’re in with that guy, get out while you can still walk. I mean it, if you gotta play the tough guy at least go work for Joe.”
Nicky shuffled his feet.
“Come on kid, what are you so all fired wanting to tell me, and too shit-scared to spit out?”

“Johnny sent Callendar out to get you. When those guys were arrested? Every one knows who they are and they know what you saw. When I mentioned that you were here for the wedding I thought Johnny was going to blow a fuse. I mean Callendar’s expensive Dave…”
“I’m supposed to be flattered?”
“….they want those guys back on the street. If they can pin dad’s murder on them, the cops will start wondering about other jobs they might have done and that would mean big trouble for Johnny and some of his friends.”

“And they really think I came here to talk to the police?”
“No they know you came for the wedding, but they don’t understand why you stayed.”
“Joe warned me something was happening, I wanted to make sure momma would be ok. You, you’re old enough to fend for yourself. But momma needs someone to rely on. Joe does the best he can, but he’s no kid either. Now let’s go home, I’m starving.”


*****************************************************************

When the two brothers walked into the apartment the smell of chicken soup hit them. Starsky grinned at his brother. “I’m not sick. Are you sick?” Then to his mother who was coming out of the kitchen wiping her hands on her apron “Hey momma, someone sick, I smell chicken soup.”
“I thought you’d like it, I put noodles in it ……………..”
“Chicken noodle soup, hey maybe I feel a little fever coming on here.” He put his hand to his forehead, staggered back a couple of paces and then collapsed into a chair.
“You’ll never change, always teasing your momma. One day…”
The brothers chorused their mother’s next words “…one day I won’t be here any more, then you’ll be sorry.” Starsky went over to his mother and putting his arm around her waist hugged her close and kissed the back of her neck. “Momma I love you.”
As he turned away, he hoped she didn’t see the tears forming in his eyes.


They were still eating when the ‘phone rang. Nicky jumped to it before any one else could move. He listened for a couple of seconds then held it out to his brother. “It’s Joe. He wants to see you now. Jerry’s on his way.”
“Tell him I’ve already left.” Before anyone could protest, he was out of the apartment and on the streets. “Wish I had my gun with me” he thought as he started out in the chilly New York air. Pulling his sweater jacket tight (and reflecting that it was a good thing he’s brought it) he hurried his pace.

A few blocks later he was turning into the alley. He could hear footsteps…but then again perhaps he couldn’t, maybe the footsteps were echoes in his mind. The alley was as badly lit as it had ever been. Starsky started to hurry. At the end of the alley he could see a car. “Shit! Hope they’re on my side.” Somewhere behind him he heard footsteps, and these were certainly not echoes from his memory. Instinctively he ducked behind a trash can.
He saw his father walking home…..another day another bit of pay……….bang

Bang.
Somewhere behind him a cat had knocked the lid of a trash can to the ground in its search for an evening snack.
Starsky stayed still and listened. The footsteps were still coming down the alley. He couldn’t move

He couldn’t move
Listening, and holding his breath, he waited. Seeing a pile of cartons a couple of feet further up the alley he moved with more stealth than the alley cat had managed, and slipped behind the boxes for cover. The other guy was almost alongside of him. Gray steel glinted at hip level. Starsky shoved the boxes out into the other guy’s path. Jumping out fighting, he threw the man across the alley and twisting his arm up behind his back, he slammed him face first into the wall. Starsky pushed his knee into the small of the man’s kidneys, and pulled his head back by the hair. He was staring into the face of Johnny McGuire’s right hand man.
“Johnny decide not to take any risks?”
He got a grunt for a reply.
“I asked you nicely if Johnny has decided to get rid of me. Now I’d advise you to answer me, because next time I won’t ask nicely, I’ll break your back.”
“Johnny heard that Joe sent for you. He doesn’t want you to talk to anyone!”
“So he sent his cheery messenger to remove me from the scene.”


The car at the end of the alley had driven on. While he was working out what to do with his catch, another car pulled up at the end of the alley. In the streetlight’s dim beam he could see the words painted on the door “to protect and serve”; just what he needed.

The uniformed cop came towards the two men, gun braced in front of him. “Oh boy” thought Starsky,”better not make a wrong move he’s such a rookie you can still see water behind his ears.” He called out to the cop “I’m not armed. This guy attacked me. I think he wanted my wallet.”
“Both of you, put your hands where I can see them.”
Starsky whispered in his captive’s ear. “Now I’m going to do what the cop tells me. And I advise you to do the same. I want to see you hands go straight up when I let go. OK?”

As he spoke he kicked the gun along the alley in the direction of the rookie’s feet.

“He had a gun, Officer; I’ve kicked it over to you.” As he spoke, Starsky raised his hands to shoulder level, keeping them wide from his body. His assailant did the same.

The young cop came alongside them, glancing at the gun on the ground he turned to Starsky and said “Pretty risky thing to so sir, take on a man with a gun. Now put your hands on the wall both of you.” Starsky smiled and assumed the position, the other guy hit the wall but he wasn’t smiling. The cop felt inside Starsky’s jacket and down to his jeans’ pocket. Pulling out a leather wallet, he flipped it open and saw Starsky’s shield.
“I’m out of my jurisdiction, I’m not armed. He’s all yours.” Retrieving his shield from the bemused kid, Starsky started to walk away. If you want me to come and make a statement I’ll drop by tomorrow, fifth precinct, right?” The cop nodded.

Watching the police car move away, Dave thought about it for a second. He could have turned the guy in as Johnny’s hit-man. He could have told the kid what was really going on. There were always times in his life when there were things he could have done, but he didn’t always do them. He started to walk on to meet Joe. As he came out of the alley a familiar black sedan rolled up alongside him. The window slid down revealing Jerry’s worried face. “Get in! Joe’s worried about you, what in the hell made you walk?”
“I needed the exercise.” Starsky grinned at Jerry and wondered what, if anything he’d seen.

Joe was fuming. He turned on Starsky like he was still a fourteen year-old kid.
“Of all the stupid, irresponsible……”
Starsky cut him short. “Joe I did ‘Nam and I’m an undercover cop, I’m not completely dumb!”
“The last thing you are is dumb, kid, but sometimes you do things in the wrong way. Getting one of Johnny’s favorite thugs arrested was not a good move.”
“I dunno, looks like I’ve got him off my back anyway.”
“Davey listen to me, you have to make a decision. I can protect your family, but I don’t know how long I’ll be here to do it. I know I can count on some to carry on, but the game gets dirtier every day, you know that from where you are. What are you going to do?”
Starsky sat in his chair, leaning forward he ran his fingers through his hair (what was left of it anyway). Bringing his palm over his face, he sighed. Joe watched him. The kid who he’d sent out to LA to keep him out of danger had grown to be a man like his father; upright physically as well as morally. Joe couldn’t help noticing how straight the ‘kid’ sat. It was something Hutch could never get over either. Without losing a certain relaxed air, Starsky always held himself upright. He stood half at ease and half at attention either with his hands behind his back, or hanging loosely in front of him; unless he was leaning at some crazy angle against a doorpost or a wall. He was sitting in his usual position now, butt pushed to the back of the chair, back straight, legs slightly apart, straight, hip to knee, knee to ankle, a perfect right angle. Neither Hutch nor Joe could know that this way Starsky kept any hint of pain at bay. He’d had to relearn his posture during those long months in Hawaii. Only the occasional hitch and limp when he was running gave him away. He didn’t show it, but his leg hurt now, the fight had knocked him off balance for a split second and getting himself back on keel meant a sharp jerk to a knee that didn’t like to jerk sharply.

He looked up at Joe. His deep blue eyes reflected a certain self-questioning. Then his face hardened.
“Joe, first and foremost I’m a cop. Not only am I a cop but I’m also the key-witness to a cop’s murder. More than that, to my dad’s murder. I don’t have a choice.”
“Davey, I can only do my best……………;”
“I know that. Look after momma, Nicky seems to be able to fend for himself. I don’t like the company he keeps, but I didn’t when we were in school, and he didn’t listen to me then either. The day you don’t think you can’t protect my mom, I’ll come and take her back to LA with me – even if I have to cuff her to do it.”

They both laughed, but the laughter rang hollow.

“I’ll see that you get there safely.’
“No Joe, I know the way, I’ll walk.”
“For god’s sake Davey!”
Joe, let me do it my way. Ok?”

*************************************************************

Starsk let himself into the apartment. There were no lights on and he slipped into his bedroom. Glancing at the clock as he sat on the bed to pull off his sneakers he saw that it was past one in the morning. Sighing he undressed, and went into the bathroom. Taking care to keep the noise to a minimum so that he didn’t wake his mother, he brushed his teeth. He peed and then went back into his room. As he slipped under the covers he heard his mother’s sleepy voice. “Davey, is that you, what time is this to come home? Is Nicky with you?” He was out of the bed straight away. Not bothering to pull a robe around him he went across the hall to his brother’s room and opened the door. Nick was not home. “Tom-catting again” his elder brother grinned. As he was turning back to the room the apartment door opened. Nick came in, shoes in hand, miming the exaggerated routine of a drunk who doesn’t want to wake the household. At the same time their mother’s door opened.
Lily Starsky stood in the doorway of her bedroom, she had curlers in her hair, and a flowered wrapper pulled across her. Her two sons looked at her.
“So where have you been? Nicky you call this a time to come home? You’ve been drinking? And you Davey, don’t they have pajamas in California? Now go to bed the two of you, I need to sleep too.”
Nick started to his room with a sheepish look on his face. Starsky blocked the door.
Looking at his older brother’s tautly muscled body, Nick thought better of trying to push past.
“I know where I was Nicky, and I know who I was with. What I don’t know is where you were and who you were with. And you know what Nicky, I have nasty feeling that I’m not going to like the answer.”

“Hey where do you come off telling me the company I keep?”
“Depends who they are, you see tomorrow I’m going down to the fifth precinct and I’m going to have a long chat with the Captain there about one of Johnny McGuire’s friends, a friend who is going to be away for a long time; You see he tried to kill me tonight, and I don’t appreciate that kind of thing.”
“Johnny wouldn’t do that Dave, he’s a friend.”
“Joe’s right, you are dumb. Don’t you understand? One of the guys I saw the night dad was killed………..”
“You saw them?”
“…Yea, but everyone figured it was best not to let too many people in on the secret, that’s why I went away, dummy, why did you think I left? Anyway, Nicky you need to understand this right now. Johnny and his family and his ‘Family’ don’t like the idea of me being back east. In fact they’re not too keen on me ‘being’ at all. They figure that if they could get rid of me, the two men in that alley way back then, can go on with their normal law-breaking lives; killing and maiming and selling dope to school kids. Now they thought they might to me through you. They also tried to get to me through Hutch. But I’m just too good for them – with a little help from Uncle Joe. I’m still here and tomorrow I’m going to see that police Captain. It’s not too late for you to drop Johnny and his friends, go to New Jersey and spend a little time there, they only wanted to use you, they’ll forget about you. When you see that the ends have been tied up – and you’ll see it Nicky because when they haul Johnny in the press will go wild – then you can come home and make sure that momma is ok.” Starsky delivered the last six words in a way that told Nicky exactly what his brother was trying to tell him.

Starsky let Nick into his room, and went to his own bed. He was asleep before his head hit the pillow.
All the same a couple of hours later the nightmare came back.

Bang

Bang

******************************************************

The alarm woke him at eight thirty.
He climbed out of bed and went straight into the bathroom. After pissing for what felt like ten minutes, he stepped into the shower.
The hot water soon brought the shower stall up to full steam and he stood as the hot water ran down his body. Soaping himself carefully and washing his balls and cock, he wondered as he often did just how ‘uncut’ guys managed to stay clean. Body glistening, he stepped out of the shower and stood in front of the mirror. He wiped the steam off with a towel and took a good look at his face. There was a slight bruise beneath his left eye, half covering his mole. The tiny scar by the other eye hardly showed, but he could never forget that it was still there. Dave reached for his razor and covered his cheeks and chin with shaving foam. Opening the cut-throat, he started to carefully shave his two-day stubble. When she’d seen the razor on the bathroom sink, his mother nearly had a fit, how could he use such a dangerous thing, why didn’t he use a safety razor, what’s wrong with an electric razor; her questions all seemed to accuse him of wanting to hurt his mother. He asked himself the same questions once long ago, and the simple answer was, he liked the feel of the thing.

He dressed quickly and went into the kitchen to face his mother’s morning after routine. Before she could start he kissed her. “Love you, momma.”
“He loves me. He comes in at all hours, he shaves with something Jack the Ripper would have been proud of and he tells me he loves me. Sit down and drink your coffee, what do you want to eat?”
“Nothing mom, coffee’s just fine.”
“Davey……..”
“Momma! I’m not a kid anymore, I stopped growing a while back and I’m not hungry.”

As soon as he finished his coffee he was up from the table. “I have to do something today mom, I’m going to put an end to it, to the whole story. Maybe I won’t have bad dreams any more.”
“What are you going to do?”
“The cops have the men who killed dad, only they don’t know it yet. I’m going to put them straight and tell them who else to look for. I should have done it twenty years ago, but Joe thought he could handle it. Now I know that he couldn’t.”

He went out of the apartment and down into the street. The cop’s instinct made him glance left and right before starting on his way. He walked quickly, a weak ankle along with is old injury gave him a style of walking all his own. Hutch once told him it looked like he’d had a very heavy night!

As he approached the fifth precinct he couldn’t help thinking how no matter what city you were in they all looked the same. He walked up the steps and as he went in he remembered coming here as a little kid, to see his dad and walk home with him. Dave presented himself to the desk clerk; a uniformed cop who looked like he should have retired fifteen years ago. Before he could give his name the older man looked up. “You don’t need to tell me who you are, you’re the image of your old man. We were partners, I guess you don’t remember Whitey”
“Sure I do, “Starsky had a faint recollection of the guy, but as ever he was too kind to let the old man think he’d forgotten him. “Looks like they do the same here as in LA, put the old-timers on the desk.”
“They do? Hey does that mean you joined the force Davey?”
“Yep. Detective Sergeant Starsky, BCPD” he sketched a salute and winked, only the right eye moved, the rest of his face was still grinning.
“BCPD?”
“Yea it’s a section of Los Angeles, stops us thinking we’re movie stars!”

“You here because of the scuffle last night? I guess you must be the unknown cop who left the Rookie with an impressive haul.”

“That’s me. Plus I have to speak with the Captain here. Whitey, I’ve come to close the case.”
“Close the case?”
“Yea; I’m the eye witness they’ve been dreaming of ever since dad was killed.”
Whitey looked at him and suddenly saw the fourteen year old kid, stunned standing by his dead father and leaning against Joe Durniak. He’d seen the kid say something to Joe, his face pale with shock, and he’d seen Durniak say something that seemed to reassure the kid. Next thing he’d heard was that as soon as the funeral and mourning period was over the kid had gone to LA. Now he understood what he’d seen.
“Captain’s office is on the third floor, second on the left after the stairs.”
“Wouldn’t be a candy machine by the door, by any chance?”
“Well how did you know that?”
Starsky laughed as he turned to climb the stairs.

Reaching the third floor he half expected to see Hutch come out of the squad room. He knocked on the Captain’s door. “Come in!” The voice betrayed an Irish descent.
Starsky went in and stood at his usual half attention in front of the desk. The Captain was a thin man with little or no hair on the top of his head, and a beard growing on his chin only. Starsky had to stifle a giggle as he thought that “the guy either thinks he looks like Captain Ahab, or his hair fell through the bottom of his face.”

“Captain, I’m Sergeant David Starsky. I’m home from LA visiting my family. I think I have information that would interest you.”

The moment he heard the name, the Captain looked up. “Did you say Starsky?”
“Yes sir.”
“I have an open file going back twenty years………”
“My dad, sir. I saw it happen and I can identify the killers.”
“Sit down. Coffee?”
Starsky shook his head, if the stuff was as bad here as in his station he’s rather not try it.
“First Captain, I guess I should explain the arrest in the alley last night.”
“That was you? Young man you left one very confused young cop behind you. Why didn’t you stay and explain?”
“I was in a hurry, and to be honest I needed to find out a few things before I got involved.”
“You think helping to arrest Mickey Steele was not getting involved. Maybe you don’t know who he is.”
“He works for Johnny McGuire. I guess he’s a hit man. He was sent to kill me and he fucked it up. And his father killed my father. Like father, like son. That goes for both of us I guess. Does that answer your question, Captain?”
“I think we’d better get a stenographer in here and take it all down.”


Two hours later, Starsky came out of the precinct building. For the first time in twenty years, he felt he could finally accept his father’s murder. It was what the shrinks on the west coast called ‘closure’. He understood what they meant.

He decided not to go straight back to the apartment. Instead he hailed a cab and went into the city. He headed for one of the city’s most famous department stores and spent a happy half hour finding gifts for his mother.

Laden with gift boxes Starsky arrived back home before dinner was ready.
“Mom? You in?”
“I’m in the kitchen”
He slipped into living room and piled the packages on the table, he made sure his mother heard him close his bedroom door.
“Davey, is everything ok?”
“Sure mom, I’m just changing my jeans and getting my stuff together. I have an early flight tomorrow, remember?”
He heard his mother clatter the dishes to hide her reaction.

Hen she walked into the living room Lily stopped in her tracks. Her eldest son was sitting in one of the easy chairs, dressed in tan slacks, a denim shirt and a cord jacket, he was even wearing a tie. He smiled at her as she came in.
On the table were four gift packages.
“What is this?”
“I couldn’t leave without spoiling my momma just a little bit, now could I? Now I hope that whatever you’re cooking will be ok if you eat it tomorrow, because I have plans for us tonight.”
“Davey………”
“Don’t nag mom. Go put on a pretty dress. I’m taking you out to dinner.”

When he was a kid, Dave had loved to go to visit his grandma Starsky. He loved seeing her and spending time with her, especially because he was her favorite grandson, and therefore she spoiled him as much as possible. He sometimes ran to “Granny Starsky” when he knew he was in trouble at home. Not that his father was tough on him, but on the other hand he expected the kids to stick to a few rules now and then and his eldest son’s pranks occasionally went too far. When he heard his father call “David” he headed for his beloved Granny. She baked him “Jewish grandmother cookies” and she made one of the best chocolate cakes in the world. She would also tempt him with other delicacies, remnants of the traditional world she had left behind as a young woman. His father was first generation American, and somehow Dave was very proud of that. He was also aware that he was lucky, his parents were born west of the Atlantic, if not he may never have existed. Despite the flippant front he usually put up when Hutch went into one of his ‘intellectual’ riffs, Starsky thought things through, and his thoughts were a lot deeper than he would ever show. It was his self-defense to put up a aggressively jokey front – or to plain get rough - if he thought he was in danger of giving himself away. The other great thing about visiting Granny Starsky was where she lived. When she didn’t feel like cooking, or if she felt the little boy really needed a treat, they went to the Italian restaurant below her apartment. No matter how many times he went into a restaurant with red-checkered cloths as Chianti-bottle candle holders, Starsky had a fond memory of his beloved grandmother. He was in Hawaii recovering from his injuries when she died; he used the pain as an excuse to weep for a long, long time.

The Italian restaurant was no longer there, the building had gone, burned down after some kids thought it would be funny to set alight a trash can under the steps. This didn’t matter because in his wanderings during the last few days, Starsky had spotted an new Italian restaurant, maybe a little classier than the one of his childhood memories, but it did have red-checkered table cloths and Chianti-bottle candle holder. His tastes had matured too. Starsky ordered stuffed veal and wondered if it melt in his mouth like it did the first time he tasted it in LA. His mother ordered the lasagna. Dave looked at the choice of wine, Chianti was ok, but in California he’d discovered some of the French wines that the Napa Valley growers were beginning to rival with their own productions. He thought for a while, and ordered a Burgundy, a red and fruity wine from the region around the town of Maçon. One day, he promised himself he’d get to France and his visit wouldn’t be limited to the Eiffel Tower.

Over dinner his mother tried once more to talk him into staying permanently.
“You could get a transfer. You don’t have to come back to the neighborhood, but oh my Davey, I’d so much like to have you nearby.”

“Mom, I’ve made a life out there. I have friends and a good job, and even my partner Hutch is shaping up. I can go to the beach and walk, or run swim or whatever, I couldn’t do that at Coney Island! Besides, mom, I’ve gotten acclimatized to the weather out there. The cold and the damp would probably give me arthritis!”
“Arthritis! At your age!”
“Mom, I had multiple fractures, and I‘ve taken a couple of other injuries since ‘Nam. The doctor warned me to expect it in my old age, at least in LA it might come a little later. But seriously, I can’t come back. Yes I know my family is here, my momma’s here,” he flashed her his toothiest winning smile, “but mom, I have no other contacts here any more. You have to understand. Hey, you could always come and live in LA!”

His mother wiped the tear from her cheek. “I know sweetheart. I know what you say is right. But a mother can dream, can’t she?”

They went out into the chilly foggy evening. Nine o’clock in late September and winter was already knocking on the east coast’s door. Starsky shivered and put his arm around his mother’s shoulder and guided her home.


*******************************************************

 

His flight was due to leave at nine forty five that morning; which meant being out of the apartment by eight at the latest. At seven fifty five Starsky had everything packed, two minutes later Jerry appeared at the door. “Your limo sir!” he grinned as he said it.
“Joe didn’t have to ………”
“No I didn’t have to, but I want to; come on Davey, let’s see you safely off to LA where you belong.”
His mother followed them down the steps and once installed next to her son on the back seat, she started to sniff. Starsky whipped out a clean handkerchief and gave it to her with a soft smile. “Momma!”
The drive to the airport went ok. No hold-ups in any sense of the word. Starsky sensed Joe’s relief when they arrived. He had also noticed the bulge under Jerry’s left armpit.
“Now you know I hate tearful scenes, momma, so I’m going to check in and go straight through to the gate.” Seeing her face crumple he hugged her, and kissed her on the forehead, then again on each cheek. “I love you.”
“Thanks for everything Uncle Joe. You too Jerry.”
All three men knew exactly what he meant.

Looking at his childhood home-town shrinking away below him, Starsky tried not to imagine what could happen if Durniak ever lost his grip on the local tough guys.
A stewardess stood in the aisle beside him, carrying out the surreal mime routine that accompanies the safety instructions. The cop had already identified the escape routes, and his seat was nowhere near any of them. He was fatalistic enough not to give a damn.
Demonstration finished the cabin staff started on the never-ending routine, “tea or coffee?” They handed out the meal trays – Starsky refused his. Then the movie started. He couldn’t resist pulling out the ear ‘phones; the movie was yet another of the new kind of cop films: the hero cop played by an “ethnic” actor – usually Italian – dressed in casual clothes and a little too quick to shoot everyone in sight and then collapse into a scene of angst and denial. Starsky watched the film with a jaundiced eye. It makes it all look so easy. He thought to himself. These guys always win. They never have to deal with the mess that crime leaves behind. The grime and the sleaze are only as real as the make-up department’s skills. And they’re too quick with the bullets. He pulled off the headset before the titles rolled. He really couldn’t watch this stuff. He snuggled himself against the back of his seat and drifted off to a semblance of sleep. Witnesses should be careful who they talk to…They have contacts out west….Your friend back west…..they’ve woven a story to trap him….But is he street-wise Davey? …. Bang…bang… bang.

In that no-man’s land that is somewhere between sleep and wakefulness Starsky realized that he was glad that he hadn’t told Hutch about the change of ticket. If his partner wasn’t there to meet him it would be for the right reason, at least. And if he has gotten himself in too deep, either I’m going to have to pick up the pieces, or clean up a very nasty mess. Sleep finally won the battle.

“Please fasten you seat belts and return your seats to the upright position.”
The woman sitting beside Starsky nudged him awake “We’re coming in to land.” She had that motherly look that the sight of a sleeping Dave Starsky seemed to arouse in so many older women. “You must have been having very good time in New York to have slept that well!” She winked. He smiled.

As ever he was one of the first out of the ‘plane and out of the terminal. Standing in line for a cab, he decided not to call Hutch straight away.

Home. This time it felt like home. This was where his life was and where he had every intention of it staying. He dumped his bag and went to the kitchen to brew some real coffee, the stuff on the ‘plane was, of course, undrinkable. He gathered up the mail neatly stacked on the counter, and looked slowly round the room. Something was wrong. He scanned again, his eye stopped at the shelf where he kept his discs, only he could tell that they were not in order. He walked across the room, his instincts on high alert, and checked through the pile. Seeing what was missing, he sat down. What the hell? Shaking his head, he went back to the counter, poured a mug of coffee and headed for the shower. The towel on the rail was still damp. Back in the bedroom, he ran another check, everything else was as it should be.
He showered and dressed.
Starsky went over to the ‘phone on the wall in his kitchen and popped the handset off the bracket. He dialed swiftly, not needing to look at the dial; leaning against the window, his hand on the wall above his head. “Yea, Captain? It’s Starsky……I got an earlier flight…..Is everything ok?.... Hutch been behaving himself?”
The growling voice at the other end of the line put him at ease………”Yea, tomorrow, back on duty.” Replacing the receiver he smiled, a long knowing smile. Hey whadya know, the kid from Duluth just got himself some street smarts.


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